Sex Tip #24: When He Doesn’t Fuck You

Don’t ask. Tell a man that he can’t fuck you.

And it’s nice that he obeys you. Shouldn’t be that hard but it is. But not always.

Meet Carmella, 18–January birthday, Catholic, volunteering at my school before doing her teaching degree. She’s into SCIENCE so she’s a treat. Volunteering in Chem and Physics classes keeps her away from my end of the building, but we hit it off anyway. Not the least of which was that she graduated from high school at 16 and thinks the place is in need of some serious juice.

As a good girl at a Catholic school she was an obedient servant of Jesus, except when she indulged in the sinful lust of envy of her best friend, Dierdre, who was fucking any of 3 boys who she also really liked. Mental lust is as sinful as fucking. I know, I know.

Then in grade 11, she found out that they were comparing notes on fucking her friend. Of course she told her. Dude with the longest cock talked about what she did when he really rammed her. The other dingbats were on about squeezing her boobs until she almost cried. Basically she was their meat. They didn’t suck her clit, make her cum or make her body an orgasmic temple of fuck. They just used her. And she learned nothing about how to rock her cum.

And how did Carmella find out? One of them [drunk] simply told her what they said about her friend. That was the last time she even pondered pre-marital sex. I get that. I so do. She kept her rosary in her purse and embraced her virginity. High 5!

Fast forward to last Christmas. Her 16 year old brother, her mom and her go to Cabo for Christmas. The Mexicans really get into the Jesus of it all, so that was a bonus for her little sociology observations about Christmas on the Baja.

But the highlight of her trip was fucking around with this guy, but not fucking him. And without going into the #notallmen thing, let’s just say many men are assholes, sexually. But many aren’t. And after months of talking about all this, Carmella finally shared with me her journal, which she shares with her slutty best friend and slutty cousin in Kamloops, and without permission to type it into here verbatim so you can see what she pulled off in Cabo, I was allowed to paraphrase. Winner! But it wasn’t her regular journal, it was her IntimateSexLustSin companion journal, which she’s sure her mom doesn’t know to snoop in.

dec. 23

  1. they all took the minibus to todos santos. met dene, pronounced denny. short for branden. 24. lean and strong. seriously into yoga. they chatted a bit in the van and  ended up inviting him to join them for lunch at their table in todos santos. he was in cabo alone. likes his quiet times. they saw the fruit. saw the church. saw the surf. saw colours they’ve never seen before decorating the church. dene was interested in the church but not in a catholic kind of way, but in a humans-are-cool kind of way.
  2. on the way back to cabo they stopped at this random beach for the swimming part. the waves were bigger than in cabo, and less “i’ll killlllll you all!” but not quite as warm. dene was funny, full of smirks when dean [her brother] poked fun at her ass. her new one piece has ties at the sides to raise or lower the amount of butt coverage. while she kept having to lower them to cover herself, the pacific ocean wanted the bottom half of herbum exposed and kept loosening the ties back up. which is why the sheer black swimming skirt was useful. dean kept on about her huge butt and trying to slap herexposed ass. and dene laughed him off, but in a slightly dismissive way. which was nice and made dean mostly go away. and dene said that her butt is curvy and luscious. as an extension of her wide welcoming hips. huh? [i was convinced it was a compliment because some guys like round, juicy asses.]
  3. so he paused as says “wide welcoming hips are good for a solid base for a man to manoevre on top of.” and in Camella’s head, she’s immediately like, no, you don’t get to fuck me. but she calmed down a bit and stopped being paranoid and smirked. she’s a big girl and can take that. even though last december she was just 17.
  4. and then dene said ass slapping doesn’t have to be taunting. a solid high velocity yet slow motion touch can be a good thing. and as at that moment the pacific yet again pushed the swimming skirt up over her back, her white butt was there, facing him. and he was looking, so she’s like, “show me. i didn’t get that slow motion part.”
  5. so he swings his hand down onto her butt, but instead of removing it, he keeps it there, with his fingers pointing down, cupping the bottom of her cheek. then he slides his fingertips down the top of her thigh for a cm or so and lifts it away, with a “voila!”
  6. and she’s happy with that. that works. she did NOT dislike him touching her. but once again she’s like, “no, you don’t get to fuck me. but i was thinking of fucking him. which is fine.” [no, it’s sinful, but i don’t judge!]

dec. 26, practically midnight

  1. she ran into dene a couple times over the holiday. and he had the early dinner with her crew yesterday, christmas, and he crashed early.
  2. she saw him tonight after dinner at the pool. enjoyed the margaritas in the pool bar and saw karin. karin with an i. she was on the van to todos santos and the object of dean’s badly hidden glances. karin and her friend are about 35 and she has the very large boobs. but not so large that she couldn’t carry her plastic margarita cup inside the strap of her bikini between her boobs. 2 straws stuck together allow the sipping. Carmella thought she’s a fancy piece. she still liked her by the time boxing day rolled around. and here dean was probably masturbating in the shower thinking about all her side boobs he saw at the beach up the coast.
  3. around 9 they went into the beach jacuzzi with the last margs for the night. not a huge jacuzzi, but it wasn’t crowded. eventually karin, her bud and 3 other people came in. getting a bit crowded. and dene moves beside her. legs touching. fine. then the games.
  4. he puts her hand on his knee and then puts his hand on hers. “do you want to lead or follow?” oy. she says “follow.” and he slides his fingers around her knee and she does the same. the up along the top of her thigh to the top of the skirt at the bathing suit ties, then over to her belly. and of course he has an erection, she notices as she slides her hand onto his yoga belly and brushed his pokey shorts. margarita, plus not touching a penis in 80 years made her happy. “but no, that doesn’t mean he can fuck me.” [Carmella said she had touched and rubbed a handful of penises in her life. rarely sucked, never manifested an dude’s orgasm except was “gifted” with a few, but she sure liked the feel of a hard cock rubbing up against her.]
  5. then his hand goes up, but not to her boobs because he’d end up elbowing her in the head to get his arm that high. so her hand goes up. then he’s back down to her belly and she’s like “PLEASE don’t go down,” not totally screaming it in her head but willing his hand to stay up, but at the same time wanting him rubbing her. so while his hand is doing NOTHING on her belly, she slides her knees apart. honestly yeah, hoping and waiting. and he goes down. and it FELT SO NICE! and she turn her head and kissed him as he slowly rubs her.
  6. this goes on for weeks and he stops kissing and moves his hand off. and at that point she realizes she stopped playing the game. she hadn’t grab his penis like she should have. yikes! and he stands up and turns around so that he’s facing the ocean and kneels on the seat part. and he grabs her hand to pull her around beside him. and they lean on the edge of the jacuzzi looking at the ocean down the way. and under the jacuzzi water he slides his hand up under my skirt and rubs all that expose butt of hers. loving it. and more than a few times he slides his fingers up under the bathing suit and pulls it up some more and he gets his hand all over all her butt. she loosens what’s left of the ties below her hips so the bottom of her suit is maximally loose.
  7. and after a few months of this, jose security guard walks by and says it’s 10 o’clock so the pool and hot tub are closed. and a few minutes later all the coloured lights in the pool area go out, leaving just the white ones that keep everyone from bonking their heads on everything. and she hadn’t been in the jacuzzi at 10pm before because it turns out that 10pm doesn’t mean anyone leaves, but that it becomes a naked hot tub. and karin with an i stands up, and takes off her bottoms, then her top, letting the serious boobs free. and everyone else gets naked, so Carmella sits down. “not for me” she’s thinking. and dene sits down. and it’s clear that karin’s buddy is rubbing her boobs under the water. and dene says she may want to just slide the straps off her shoulders. ok fine. and her boobs are freeing up a bit. and karin with an i is smiling and this other couple gets out of the jacuzzi. nice penis. nice small boobs. and they walk down to the ocean. Carmella is certain karin is getting her pussy rubbed too. she kept staring at her looking for some kind of sign. nope. all in her head. or not.
  8. and dene says let’s get out of here. and she says ok. get up and feel her boobs half way spilling out, watching dene look at them. and he didn’t lick his lips but she could see his face was all about sucking her now. grabbed her bag, feeling for the key in there, yes. and sandals and like a champ, she keep my straps down. feeling the air on more of her boobs than normal. dene still has the erection and he is completely casual. which was deeply attractive. want to come up to my room he says. and she says sure. he has all the bottled water he says. walking for a bit and she just blurts out, “this doesn’t mean you can fuck me.” and he smiles and laughs abit and says no worries. and she says “sorry, i just meant, i’d like to not have sex.” and he’s like, no worries. and now she wants to fuck him. crap!

and a number of things happen over the next couple hours.

  1. she didn’t fuck him.
  2. got into his room and he walked me over in front of the tall mirror. and stood behind her and pressed his penis onto her ass. thank you very much for that.
  3. he put his hands on hers, then all 4 on her belly. he pushed one hand down and one up. legs go apart a bit for more warm Carmella rubbing. and the other hand is up and holding her breast.
  4. tell him it’s been a while. like a couple years since she did any of this. and when she did any of this before it was not hugely fun for her. and he’s like, no worries.
  5. and kissing.
  6. and he pulls her hands behind her and they rub her ass. love it.
  7. then he’s holding her breasts, rubbing nipples. and he says that she drive now. she can do whatever she wants. and her heart has won this lottery feeling.
  8. she steps behind him and looks at his body in the mirror. grabbed his penis and squeeze and rub it. then open his shorts and drop them. such a beautiful penis, my god. so nice to rub. so nice.
  9. and she get down. lick it and suck it. so nice. so much warmth and she just knows he’s not going to push it in her mouth so he can cum. and he doesn’t. so nice.
  10. so she lies face down on the bed and says to make her feel amazing.
  11. he climbs on top and rubs his penis on her ass and starts telling her things. this is what he’s wanted to do for days. since the beach. since he touched her butt. and he pulls her legs apart and slides his hand under to rub her pussy more. yes. and he thumbs her butt. then he pushes up my bathing suit as high as it goes so most of her butt is out. he rubs his penis all over it, then slides it under and between her legs and rubs it on her pussy. and she tells that part in her head that wants to fuck him, to shut up.
  12. then he rolls her over and lies on top of her and kisses her and begins grinding his penis on her pussy. so wet. 8 years later he pulls the top of her suit down and sucks her boobs so softhardsofthard. then he slides up and titfucks her. but not with intent to injure. not with the idea of pressing his penis into her nipple so hard that she whimpers, cuz that’s not fun, she knows from experience. because why would anyone. then she licks his penis some more. so nice.
  13. then they drink the water more. and they say words. and some of them are that she doesn’t masturbate. that she’s only had a couple probably orgasms. that she’s never had sex and she’s ok with wanting to but knowing she’s not ready yet. and some of the words are dene asking if she’s 18 and her saying yes, because it was days away from being true anyway, so there. and more talking. and then he just begins narrating.
  14. he pulls the suit off the rest of the way
  15. rubs his penis on her pussy, the grinding is hot. and sliding her legs apart lets him rub his penis on her lips. so slippery. here, her hips being welcoming enough for his hips to work around in here.
  16. and straddling her lets them both rub his cock, and he can reach back to finger her clit, but he won’t push inside her vagina.
  17. and sliding down on her lets him lick her pussy and finger her clit, and here he’d usually have a couple fingers inside her, feeling the warm and wet of her vagina. and he squeezes her bum while making her clit swell.
  18. and she moans and rubs her nipple and squeezes her bum too as she has her first doubtless orgasm. that moment knowing she’s merely had little thrill things before…not like this.
  19. and when it ends she pushes him back because she needs water and he can’t touch her now because she’ll explode.
  20. and she drinks and drinks. and she lies down and curls and holds herself and says she wants to see him cum. and she sucks him and rubs his balls and tells him to show her how he cums.
  21. so he pulls her up along side him at the top of the bed so he can kiss her and lick her boobs. and he begins a hard pounding rubbing and closes his eyes and moans and rubs so hard.
  22. then he gets on top of her and starts grinding again, but says that this is a good way for her to cum, to press his penis on her clit and grind it around. and she can hold it and move it all over her clit as she needs. but now he’s going to talk about just the tip.
  23. and he presses the head of his cock down from her clit onto her vagina. and he says that assholes often lie when girls say they don’t want to fuck. and they say they just want to put the tip into her vagina. just the tip. and press a bit. and pull out. then in goes the tip again. and it gets covered in her cream and he slides it around a bit. then he’ll push a bit more. but just the “rest” of the tip. and by tip he really meant the whole head. but that’s all. meanwhile all he’s doing is nestling the tip between her lips. at her vagina. not in. and he says this is where they rape you, because the tip becomes the head and then he says it feels so good and asks you if it feels good too. and you say yes cuz duh. and you want him in you even though you don’t. and you can’t stop anything now because he CAN’T keep putting just the head in, he needs to feel his penis all the way inside your vagina. all the way as far as he can get it.
  24. then meanwhile, he slides his tip back up to her clit and grinds some more and says she has to beware this “just the tip” bullshit. and he slides up and slides his cock into her mouth and she sucks and he presses a bit hard and she gags and chokes a bit and he pulls out and lies beside her again and starts rubbing his now much wetter penis again. and he speeds up then slows…right…down…and holds it tight…then it blows cum up his chest and onto her belly and breasts and onto the pillow and sheets.
  25. and he sighs and thumbs his penis head as the rest of his cum comes out. and she rubs it gently and feels the warm cum cool on his penis and belly and on her breasts.
  26. and she tastes it and it’s yes. and she sucks him gently and he smiles and laughs and has the big happy eyes.
  27. and he gets a couple warm washcloths and washes them and they drink.
  28. and other things happen.
  29. she stands, wide-legged, facing out of the sliding door, looking at the ocean. he turns out the lights and watches her rub her bum. and bend over a bit and rub her clit. and turn around and rub her boobs.
  30. and he stands behind her looking into the mirror, poking his penis between her legs for her to finger.
  31. and he kneels and goes down on her as she stands in front of that mirror, leaning back against a chair.
  32. and he lies on her, grinding some more. and he says how much of him could fit inside her. and she dreams and dreams of it. and he says how amazing it feels to cum inside a woman. and that guys will do almost anything to do it. but that he’s not an asshole. he smiles.
  33. and it’s after midnight and she’s getting tired but she needs to shower. so they shower and kiss and rub and suck some more. and she is so happy.
  34. and they get their suits on again and go out for a dip in the pool. the hot tub is still full of a few naked people but they want to be alone. they drift quietly together and in her mind she’s thinking that she has enough chlorine smell on her to go back to her room. and she thinks she’s paranoid too. but all that’s ok.

And in the end, she’s not sure his name was Braeden or Branden and if he lived in Boise or Boulder. But we all know she’ll never see him again. They flew home a day later and she only glanced at him across the pool yard a couple times but couldn’t grab a minute to see him. But that felt all ok.

SHE felt all ok. And she ended up with a high bar to use for the next guy. And the next guy.

And then, days into January, she turned 18. Whatever that meant in Mexico, Canada or the USA. And she knew that something was slightly risky with all that. But that she invested in trust and she knew her soul and it was sublime.

And she stopped counting her orgasms months ago. Too many to count. And she’s still single and has not been allowed to attend my bra-less parties until she’s 19, so soon.

But she comes to regular parties and holds her own. High-5.

And in the end, she now knows that some guys actually won’t fuck you if you ask them to.