Sex Tip #22: We Should All Charge for Sex

i was talking to a christian virgin in her 20s last week, the sister of a girl i teach with. she is good without intercourse. she has a firm line. she considers it an issue of personal integrity and morality. all fine.

but she loves being sucked and sucking so her morality doesn’t stop her from getting to third base. good girl. and she has the classic girl lament that once her boy cums, he has a hard time focus on her mere existence! 🙂

ladies first. has to be said. but, continuing on…

but she had something really interesting to say.

she thinks of sex as a massively powerful thing. and she figures that if girls choose to cease to be virgins before marriage [which she understands but doesn’t embrace herself obviously], she wonders why all girls don’t charge for it.

so she clearly doesn’t judge sex trade workers, but she also sees it like compromising a virtue being a very black and white thing. once you have sex you’ve crossed a line. you’re in another realm of virtue. different. and in her case, for herself: lesser.

but she figures that if she were to cross that line and have sex, she should charge for it. it is possibly the greatest currency of power in the human history. there should be no reason why she shouldn’t charge $500 for the honour of fucking her. note she didn’t say $50. she knows how to price commodities.

and then she went on to talk about things i agree with, like how marriage is in some ways “just” an economic arrangement where in the past, women became housewives and kept the home for the man and didn’t have to work but in exchange for all that economic value, she fucked her husband. and in that view, women weren’t sexual creatures, but cunts for receiving cum. turns out women actually like to fuck, but whatever. 🙂 only they didn’t have to swallow or even suck his dick after she had a ring on.

and i like this chick. she’s got it figured out. and she has a killer petite body. dragon boats, cross country skiing, part time vegan diet. i’d fuck her if i were a guy. and i may just pay $500.

last summer i saw her in her bathing suit, drunk, at dusk, at a campsite at a lake near whistler. i saw how poorly her bathing suit fit after several hours in it and after losing her ability to stand up straight 100% of the time. and i wasn’t the only one who noticed her awesomeness. and i know that she sucked at least one of the boys on our trip. deeply. so she’s got the game, as they say.

but to know, not just think but know, that there’s been NOTHING in her cunt, that’s just stunning. and if she were to let a boy inside her [well, that part of her], i could see that she’d want to be properly compensated for it. i know this because i’ve taken money, restaurants, clothes, hotel stays and wild rides in convertibles in exchange for fucking a guy.

so i told her about my various times being more or less a prostitute and she could totally relate. i didn’t tell her EVERYthing i’ve done sexually that had a payout [beyond the scope of our conversation], but i concluded with this idea: if a girl like this agrees with me on the economic and power nature of sex, i think i’m on solid ground.

in touch,

holly

Advertisements

Even Christians Need Gaydar

I had the mildly unpleasant duty of telling my friend Charlotte that the boy she has a crush on is gay. Bi, at the very least.

Not that there’s anything wrong with that… 🙂

Being bi myself, I can’t really judge Charlotte’s boy at all. But the unfortunate part of all this is that Charlotte assumes everyone at her church is straight…because they’re at her church.

Being Christian doesn’t mean you’re straight. Most Christians are straight because most people are mostly straight.

Christians at conservative not-so-gay friendly churches are not allowed to be gay. And if they are, as long as they don’t partake of any gay sex, they’re technically not sinning.

Christians at progressive, liberal churches can be as gay as they like.

But my dear Charlotte has liked this boy for some time now. She’s spoken of him often and last sunday I attended her church, mostly to see this dude. She insisted I wear a bra, btw.  🙂

So in about 10 seconds after meeting this guy, I knew he was gay. And he, of course, doesn’t know she has a crush on him. I can’t tell if he knows he’s gay or if he’s just ok with being who he is. He just seems to like Charlotte. And why not. She’s awesome.

But the assumption that males at conservative churches are worth being attracted to because they’re not gay for sure, is a bad one. It means girls don’t have to cultivate gaydar. This can be a debilitating disease.

Now, our agenda is to figure out why Charlotte is falling for a gay guy. Has she done this in the past? What has been her relationship like with her father? Is she looking for a safe guy to avoid real sex pressures or actual commitment?

These are the questions we are now talking about.

And maybe I’m reading too much into it. Maybe Charlotte just lacks gaydar. But either way, we’re going to get to the bottom of it!

In touch,

Holly

Braless Parties Have Rules Like the Fight Club

ok, so i haven’t seen the fight club, but i know there are rules. like the first rule is to not talk about fight club? right?

the first rule of braless parties is that girls who do not arrive without a bra are required to take them off. they may take it home when they leave.

that’s it. otherwise, it’s just a party, except with nipples everywhere. and a heightened state of eroticism.

i like games with a small number of rules. like, orgasm=suck me. simple.

we’ve had about 5 nights in the last few weeks that have been declared braless. we’ve tried for 4 more, but various girls vetoed the idea.

i can respect that. we tried once they were already over. not everyone was interested. now we give fair warning. but not every party is braless. that’s just CRAZYass!!!

so our tina’s young fresh nubile virginal adventurous timid honest shy outgoing cool nerdy sister has moved to town. going to sfu studying arts. pick a major lllllllllllllllater girl. good girl.

and she’s living in res and enjoying meeting people.

and she’s come over a few times. only 1 was a time when we were having a braless party.

that’s her bra above. C-cup. but she’s already gained 3 pounds since she moved to town in august so we’re bugging her about the other 10 pounds she’ll gain this year and how she’ll need all new bras. she’ll have none of that. good girl again.

at any rate, she’s a good girl. christian too, so i approve. 🙂

she’s had some boyfriends, she’s been to third base, she’s dated guys who weren’t virgins, but she still is. and her goal is to change all that. not in the same crazy sex-fiend way that i did 6 years ago when i came to vancouver. at least i hope.

no i take that back. i hope she does what she does. even bad shit is a learning experience.

me and tina and her have created an adultfriendfinder.com account for her. we won’t tell her i.d. though. but if you ask me [smwr1982] i might tell it if i screen you and you pass. lol

she realllllly wants to go in there and hang out in the chat rooms and hear how all that’s done. i told her it’s less representative of the real world than the real world. our parties are also less representative, but at least at our place there won’t be 900 boys trying to get her to watch them cum.

not that there’s anything wrong with that. 🙂

so of all the hijinks going on at our braless parties, tina’s sister has been a good little girl. granted the majority of girls at these parties don’t spring into orgies. in fact, most nights nothing happens.

but one things for sure. her statuesque build and big boobies are a hit.

and while she has not been ignored by the boys, she’s staking out her turf.

this is just one benefit of braless parties.

i highly recommend them. especially if you like the boobies!:)

in touch,

holly and tina

6 Reasons to Have Casual Sex? Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes

6 Reasons to Have Casual Sex | Sex & Relationships | AlterNet.

ok, so i’m down for all 6.

1. Asserting your desires can create a tremendous sense of power.

Yes.

2. It might help you transcend your inhibitions.

“This is the very target at which critics aim their arrows—how can women enjoy sex without an emotional connection?!—but this lack of investment can be freeing. It’s the same relative anonymity that causes some people to blurt out their deepest secrets to their hairdresser or a taxi driver.”

yes, or the girl in the coffee shop in montreal. then you start dating. then you drag her back to vancouver with you and put her pix at the top of your blog! 🙂

so true!

3. You’ll learn more about your sexuality

um, fuck yeah.

4. You might learn about yourself emotionally

“The fear and propaganda around one-night stands isn’t just sexist, it’s illogical. Bad long-term relationships involving miscommunication, unmet expectations, and lies are just as likely to damage participants as any sexual disappointment on a short-term scale.”

this is why i gleefully call myself a whore. to defuse the judgement that i get as a loose woman, when men are admired for the same behaviour.

5. You might be a better partner in a committed sexual relationship

“If you’ve experienced sex as a vehicle for relatively emotionally uncomplicated pleasure, you may even be less likely to go along with sex you don’t want, or to seize upon sex as a tool for manipulation.”

life’s short. try it once, if you don’t like it, move on. ok, maybe try it twice with a second partner. 🙂

“Another recent study, one conducted on 1,311 Minnesotans between the ages of 18 and 24, found that there was no correlation between emotional or mental distress and casual sex.”

liberation!

6. You’ll learn more about sex

liberation, some more.

jury’s in. get on it.

and to celebrate, the next cute chick i see in a coffee shop, sorry not starbucks tho, i’m going to flip my hair, bat my eye lashes and lean in close to see if she’d like to fuck me.

who will join me on this grand quest!?

“Debating” Patriotic, Christian, American Zealots

Wow. I love these wierd encounters in Twitter. I just ran across an American who is going on about how their empire’s decline is party of God’s plan for the second coming. I’ve heard that a lot before from egocentric Americans. I could make the same argument for Britain 100 years ago. Awful of me to be a history teacher and know a bit about past empires.

Anyways.

I’m trying to see if this person could explain to me coherently why America is at the centre of God’s plan. Here’s my Twitter conversation with SeasonsOfGrace. Crazy, man, just crazy shit.
@SeasonsOfGrace i’m sorry, what does jesus have to do with america’s decline? i don’t get that. 42 minutes ago via HootSuite

@HollyOrzabal If you are a Christian, you should know this. Study that Bible! STUDY IT! Read every day. That is God’s word to you! 30 minutes ago via web in reply to HollyOrzabal

@SeasonsOfGrace i am. i do. i was just wondering why so many americans think the state of their empire has something to do with His return. 32 minutes ago via HootSuite in reply to SeasonsOfGrace

@SeasonsOfGrace well, since “america” isn’t in the bible, i was looking for more than a fortune cookie answer. 26 minutes ago via HootSuite in reply to SeasonsOfGrace

@HollyOrzabal A fortune cookie? I’m no Chinese restaurant. I’m a Christian and I speak about these topics that is ALL. I’m ready to go, R U? 23 minutes ago via web in reply to HollyOrzabal

@SeasonsOfGrace isn’t He coming for me too? i’m a canadian. 26 minutes ago via HootSuite in reply to SeasonsOfGrace

@HollyOrzabal I didn’t ask if you were a canadian? I asked if you were a Christian. I still ask, do you read and study your Bible? 24 minutes ago via web in reply to HollyOrzabal

@SeasonsOfGrace i already answered that. i am a christian and i read the bible. can you tell me why the state of america’s empire matters? 23 minutes ago via HootSuite in reply to SeasonsOfGrace

@HollyOrzabal I say this in all sincerity and love, if you must ask if He’s coming for you; perhaps you need to have a LONG talk with Him. 22 minutes ago via web in reply to HollyOrzabal

@SeasonsOfGrace i’m not asking if he’s coming for me. i know he is. what’s up with the “america” thing? you sound like a bot. 20 minutes ago via HootSuite in reply to SeasonsOfGrace

@HollyOrzabal America has been and was founded on Godly principles. Our Constitution is based upon God. We have been so blessed…. 19 minutes ago via web in reply to HollyOrzabal

@HollyOrzabal We’ve been the world’s superpower for many years. Why? Because we were a Godly nation. Now we are not. And we are failing. 19 minutes ago via web in reply to HollyOrzabal

@HollyOrzabal God said, “I will bless those who bless thee &curse those who curse thee” speaking of Israel.What is the US doing to Israel? 18 minutes ago via web in reply to HollyOrzabal

@HollyOrzabal America has a LOT to do with the end times. But you live in socialism and you are not free, you don’t know what we know… 17 minutes ago via web in reply to HollyOrzabal

@SeasonsOfGrace standard america=centre of the universe stuff. ok. nuff said. how does this interpretation speak to christians in fiji? 16 minutes ago via HootSuite in reply to SeasonsOfGrace

@HollyOrzabal Well, I’m sorry if you think I sound like a bot. I’m just telling you the WAY IT IS. If you can’t accept that,then don’t read. 17 minutes ago via web in reply to HollyOrzabal

@HollyOrzabal Obviously you know nothing about our history (but many Americans don’t either) and you are NOT AMERICAN. We are not canadians. 16 minutes ago via web in reply to HollyOrzabal

@SeasonsOfGrace i’m a history teacher. i spent 2 weeks in dc 4 years ago. i know more of your history than you likely know of mine. 13 minutes ago via HootSuite in reply to SeasonsOfGrace

@HollyOrzabal No, you are wrong. Our country IS important to us.That is 1 difference.We love our country,we are patriotic.We R fighting now 13 minutes ago via web in reply to HollyOrzabal

@SeasonsOfGrace i live in socialism? you are deluded. how am i not free? we have a constitution and charter of rights. get educated. 12 minutes ago via HootSuite in reply to SeasonsOfGrace

@HollyOrzabal We are fighting for our freedom. We don’t appreciate socialism, we don’t want the government to “give” us things. 12 minutes ago via web in reply to HollyOrzabal

@HollyOrzabal I am speaking from my heart, what the Holy Spirit put on it. If you have a problem with Americans STAY IN CANADA. 12 minutes ago via web in reply to HollyOrzabal

@HollyOrzabal I know a lot. But I’m not debating you. You are ignorant. You are a bot because you are TOLD what you can and cannot do. 11 minutes ago via web in reply to HollyOrzabal

@HollyOrzabal History teacher, I am praying for you.Open that Bible and read it. Ask Jesus to forgive you for your sins and you will be free 10 minutes ago via web in reply to HollyOrzabal

@SeasonsOfGrace who tells me what i can and can’t do? 9 minutes ago via HootSuite in reply to SeasonsOfGrace

@HollyOrzabal LOL. Right. Canada is SOCIALIST. I’m not debating with YOU. I am talking about God and you are trying to distract me. 9 minutes ago via web in reply to HollyOrzabal

@SeasonsOfGrace are you praying for me because being a history teach is bad or because it’s important? 8 minutes ago via HootSuite in reply to SeasonsOfGrace

Pffft! the Canadian socialist is gone. I’m sorry friends. But I will not debate freedom AND GOD in the same conversation. Satan abounds. 8 minutes ago via web

@SeasonsOfGrace i’m honestly not trying to distract you. cuba, venezuela, n.korea, china are socialist. i have just free healthcare & K-12. 5 minutes ago via HootSuite in reply to SeasonsOfGrace

News Flash: Bible Doesn’t Reject Blowjobs and Anal Sex in Marriage!

ok, this one should be obvious, but let’s not judge people for asking sincere questions after all.

but here is a good question about where to go in the married bedroom:

QUESTION: “My wife and I love the Lord with all our hearts, and we don’t want to do anything to sin against Him. Our question is in the area of oral sex. Is it scripturally wrong for married couples?”

and the answer on the webpage is correct: the bible doesn’t forbid blowjobs or bum fucking. for married partners. and while the page has a link to onanism, and Sodomites, there is no godly or earthly reason why a man should not fuck his wife’s ass. and there is nothing against them in a healthy 69 escapade!

yay blow jobs and anal sex!

but here’s my commentary. the fact that good christians are so “led” to stop thinking for themselves that they have to ask such [and many other] questions is one of the things about conservative christianity i can’t deal with. obedience to the point of sacrificing one’s own mind.

now i’m not married and i love blowjobs and [more recently] anal sex. and i use my mind to determine that while unmarried i can partake of these delicious delights. and surely i’m going to hell for this, mostly because i’m unrepentant. according to the conservative church anyway.

but i’m not so conservative, so that’s ok with me.

in the end, the bible has no comments on my vibes, lubes, girlfucking, girls grinding on the dance floor at Lick, or what i do to my girlfriend in the tub.

we must use our minds, oh children of god! and let us pray that our bodies are aligned with our minds and we can figure out what is sensible without turning to the likes of the pastor at my childhood church, who really had his head up his ass.

i wonder what the bible says about that.

Sex Tips for Christian Girls #21: Hug More, Grope Less

Last week at church I re-met Bethany. She went by Beth in September when she first came to church. She was new to UBC and checking out churches. Turns out she spent most of the year at one of the churches on campus. Now she’s back here. Had some awkward relationship/friendship weirdness at that church. Some catty chicks. Been there, felt that.

So we caught up a bit after church last week and set a time to go out to see Alice in Wonderland tonight.

Ok, so it’s a crush and that’s ok. When we met at the theatre with like 20 minutes to spare, tix were sold out so we went for a beer. Which in reality was a pitcher of sangria. And we talked for a while and figured on trying again next week for the movie.

So we were heading back to the train to head home, rode the train and at my stop she got off too cuz we were in the middle of a discussion about Johnny Depp. A luscious conversation.

And after a few minutes I was about to go and I gave her a hug.

Hugging is good. Always. I hate shaking hands. Lame. 🙂

And the hug was the kind of hug after the kind of evening where I wanted to turn it into a groping hug and bum squeezing hug and pelvis bumping hug and an invitation to come back to my place so we could play around.

And after all these months and tonight and everything I was not sure she would go for that. And now that I’m all mature and wise and not young and stupid [always, anyway] I just hugged her with the love of a friend and I injected no sexual overtures into it.

I just held her. For the normal length of  a hug. And when I was loosening up at the end of the normal length, she wasn’t letting go, so i re-held on. Just hugging in a motionless holding.

And she just got warmer. Not emotionally [though she was], like physically. Keeping the hold on, waiting for me to do something other than just hold her. And the warmer was the rising tension of something not yet happening.

And if it all ended there, that would have been just fine. A warm, tender, loving friend hug. Felt good.

But she pulled out and smiled at me and kissed my cheek. Spectacular. I felt so loved and desired and hot and wanted and affirmed and and and and…

So I smiled big and putting one hand on her cheek I kissed her other cheek. And while my other hand could quite easily have done nothing, I nevertheless put it on her hip. But mostly back around her hip. Not quite on her ass, not quite on her thigh, but behind her hip enough so I could pull it about an inch closer to me.

And we said goodnight and I left. And heading up the escalator I looked back and she was standing there looking forward to where the train would take her closer to her home. And with her right hand she brushed her hair back from in front of her left shoulder to behind her shoulder, then she slid her hand from her shoulder down along her breast and crossed her arms.

And that, that, that is the thing I want to do to her the next time I see her.

Maybe we can agree to wear skirts to Alice when we actually go to see it. 🙂