Weeping Over Family Tragedies

Warning: this post contains some real tragedy, no sex tips, nothing light, but everything of substance. Have tissues nearby.

I originally started this post a few days ago when I heard about #1, but then before I could finish it I heard about #2 and #3.

The delays have come from my ovaries sobbing. I’ve had a few random bouts of weeping when I think about or tell friends about these events. Google them to get correct facts. I won’t read the stories anymore so I may have drifted from total accuracy.

I think it means I want to be a mommy. Not today. Not 22 months ago when I was pregnant for several days. But sooner than never.

Seriously. Get your tissues.


A woman in England was 7 months pregnant. She had a teenage son, his 2 friends and her toddler in her car. It went off the road and into 6 feet of water. She got out of the car, but HAD TO CHOOSE WHO TO SAVE NEXT when she went back down. She got her toddler out, but she couldn’t save her son. His friends were able to escape the car. There was something about his window being closed which hurt his ability to get out, and that the mom asked him to close his window some time before the accident because it was too windy for the toddler in the back. Tragedy with a Sophie’s choice mixed in. Brutal. Fucking brutal.


A Vancouver man was driving on one of the San Juan Islands in Washington State. In the car was his wife, also 7 months pregnant. An SUV coming from the opposite direction, crossed the centre line, threatening to hit their car. The nature of the events were such that the only thing he could do to avoid a head-on collision what would have killed them both was to turn the wheel of his car so the SUV hit his side of the car, to give his wife and unborn baby a chance to survive. They did. He didn’t. Fucking brutal.


I’m not all sentimental about 9/11. It’s been a horrible decade in part because of it, but also because of what lots of evil bastards in the world did in response. Bush, etc. Nuff said. But I saw something this weekend about 9/11 that got me all weeping again. It was something about the thousand of unidentified body parts recovered from ground zero. And that one of the most heartbreaking ones was a man’s fist tightly holding a child’s hand. I cannot even stomach that.


Hug the ones you love. Hard.

And let the tears fall where they may.


WebCam Girls with a Heart of Gold

ok, so there’s lotsa places to find webcam girls and MyFreeCams.com is an interesting one.

dozens of girls. exhibitionism to the people! liberation!

and while many are in a nice bra/panty set, some are going gyno thumping. lotsa eastern european women. lotsa fun. 🙂



but there are two worth mentioning. while many don’t talk at all, some talk a lot. Blaire and WildLovexxx.

i met Blaire several nights ago. she was talking about her life, her loves/passions/sexuality/etc. very refreshing to see someone’s soul/personality.

i ran into WildLovexxx this afternoon on my sick day, which wasn’t sick as much as a mental health day.

she too was chatty about her life and interests, etc.

and while WildLovexxx was ok being mostly topless, Blaire is a no-nude cam girl. very interesting because the site is all about sex. except there were 200-400 people in each of their cam/chatrooms when i saw them.

so presenting an actual personality seems to kick in well.

and frankly, these are two girls, i would enjoy going for a beer with. like younger cousins.

sure, they’re attractive and exhibitionists and sexy and all that, but they are also really interesting people. and i hate to say it, but there are precious few who would be a lot of fun going out for a beer with for more than about 45 minutes. both of these two girls hit that.

Facebook Sucks. I’m Doing Twitter Now.

So 13 months ago, i shut off my internet life. lotsa things going on, lotsa stress in real life. lotsa reasons to stop this blog.

But something happened around that time that was kinda internet karma. someone reported me as inappropriate in Facebook. which is true. i’m pretty inappropriate. 🙂

But with Facebook’s fucked up sense of “OK”, it was destined to happen. i got bounced from Facebook twice before i figured out how not to get canned. losers.

But 13 months ago, it was a good time to leave and make a clean break. the trouble is, i lost touch with lotsa decent folks. and a fair share of sleazeballs who were fun to banter with. i don’t miss them. but the good people, i kinda miss them. but life goes on and they’ll cycle back in my life or not. there are almost 7 billion people in the world and billions of them are quality individuals.

So now i’m back into the blogging thing. i have lots more to say. i have lots to catch up on from my time offline.

And i’m doing it in twitter. not because it’s better than facebook, but because it’s different and less fucked up. short and sweet. like me. <blush> lol

And facebook has all that privacy bullshit and all the data mining, etc. i like the telegraph sense of twitter. who cares if homeland security is watching me in the open in twitter. i have nothing to hide and they don’t care about getting canadian teachers fired.

So it’s now retweet land for me. we’ll see how that all goes.

In touch,


News from Chinese Earthquake Survivor Stories

my gf tina is a doll. her little sis is a dollface. she’s also a sentimental, kittens are proof that god loves us, kinda girl. not naive, but open-hearted.

i don’t mock the stuff she emails. tho sometimes i do reply with some good-humoured snark.

but this week she’s been sending this stuff about survivor stories from China’s earthquake last week.

and they’re killing me. so i share the three most amazing with you. no sex. no tips. no christian girls [as far as i know].

i hope these kill you too. in the good way.

1. a baby is found alive beside its mother who died. in the blanket with the baby is a cel phone. on it is a text message saying to tell my baby that i love her.

2. a man with about 2% vision is rescued after a couple days. massive injuries, head bonk. wakes up and can’t see but has almost 20% sight. whether it will last, they don’t know. he’s ecstatic to be alive, but his ability to see light better continually moves him to tears.

3. a still breast-feeding woman survives the earthquake, but her baby doesn’t. but with all the orphans, she is nursing 6 of them.

when it gets to a point in life where i cannot imagine how i would feel/cope in a situation because it is too profoundly unimaginable. i fall speechless. when i’m not crying.

i just have no words.

I sold my car…this isn’t a sex tip :)

ok, so i sold my car for a return flight from university back to vancouver for the summer.

one of my roomates bought it because he NEEDS it, and he does. i won’t judge. but not me. i’ve enjoyed my cross-country trips from the left coast to school, but i’m done now.

hurricane katrina helped me decide. so did al gore’s inconvenient truth. the inconvenient truth is that we shouldn’t even have cars, i think. regardless of what fuel we put in them. hugo chavez, the prime minister of venezuela said you’d have to plan corn on every bit of land in the world to get enough ethanol to fuel all the cars we drive. then what would we eat!

so i sold my car and i’m going to live car free. i’m sure i can do it. hell, most people in the world do it. and vancouver has a great transit system, despite what the whiny idiots say about it being too slow and expensive. sure it costs money, but waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay less then a car.

i mean i must have spent like $10,000 on my car in the 5 years i had it, that’s $2000/year and a 3 zone bus pass in vancouver is like $130/month, which is way less then $2000/year.

and the time thing. people are stupid about time. STUPID, i say! it is not money. it is not your life. being on tranist lets me enjoy my time to relax. hell, i lost my watch at wreck beach 3 years ago and never replaced it. time is a variable. if you let it control your life, you are a loser. that’s the truth.


sell you car. 🙂

it feels great!

in touch,