Going Braless, Yes!

As long as I’m meat, men will define the boundaries of my identity and sexuality. I choose bralessness in a variety of circumstances.

As a teacher, my job is to empower people. I choose to wear a bra at work because the stress of not doing so is not worth the hassle.

But it turns out, Kaitlyn is braver than me!

Burn your bras, sistas!

And frankly, I’d like to punch in the throat any male colleague who cannot contend with a braless student in class. Complete and utter bullshit!

This is the shirt Kaitlyn was wearing when she was sent to the office.

When I left the office, I was so upset that I posted a picture of what I was wearing on Facebook, telling everyone, ‘If any of you are curious, this is the shirt I was wearing when I was called out.’ I most definitely wasn’t wearing anything against the dress code.” 

braless

via Facebook / Kaitlyn Juvik

Principal Steve Thennis said he won’t check someone’s undergarments but does ask they dress appropriately…

…“and if we feel it is inappropriate, male or female, we are going to ask them to cover up.” 

Need Advice for My Sweet Friend

so yeah, i’m not much for asking for advice.

not because i’m perfect or genius but because i usually only write about things where i’m the expert. and that’s ok.

it’s also ok to say hey. what do you say to this dude. i’m at a bit of a loss for words.

there are 2 issues going on. they may be related, but only distantly. either way, they came up around the same time the other night.

we had another bra-less party that turned into a bit of a sex party on saturday. it was full of weird shit. booze, pot, chicks with assertive nipples and the men who love them.

i fucked no one, but i watched 3 orgasms, including one penetration event that made me want to cum right there. but i didn’t. i was the host.

but there was an afterparty. as there always is.

and a sweet dude friend of mine was the last one to be awake with me. on my bed. just talking. he lacks confidence. not that there was going to be the sex with me, but still. confidence thing.

within a few minutes of each other, these 2 things came out.

  1. in grade 5, he did something bad in school. no memory of what it was. he was generally a good kid. still is! but he got yanked out of the classroom where his nazi teacher started tearing into him…for whatever the thing was. she was tall and imposing and generally mean anyway. once she got a few sentences in, he peed his pants. right there in the corner of the hallway outside the classroom. i asked what he did after that. he guesses that he went back into class. he must have smelled like pee. everyone must have known, but he has no memory of that. but i don’t see how they couldn’t. no other memories of that day. no surprise there. amazing that he didn’t block that out. in fact, blocking that out would have been awesome. but it’s tormented him for almost 2 decades. so my question for advice is below. now read the next thing.
  2. we were also talking about things that were demeaning to us. sexually. i have a bunch of stories from university. i had low sexual self-esteem. boys did degrading things to me. not on my terms, unlike now. 🙂 but i have recovered my sense of dignity from those events. my sweet dude friend, though, is similarly tormented by this sexual encounter. despite it being different from the pants peeing, it has the same effect on him. he was dating a girl in university. she worked in the library [not a student] and he was. they would watch movies at her place. sitting on her bed [studio suite]. he liked her. she was sexually self-determining. he was happy to get any kind of making out. but he was lacking confidence to “make a move” on her. so sweet! at any rate, they had a respectful friendship, with attraction. one night she “made a move” on him. she reached over and held his hand and said she wants to have a good time now. he blushed and kept telling the story. she started kissing him and rolled on top of him. grinding and going mmmm when he rubbed her ass. she talked dirty to him, “squeeze me, bitch” and “what are you going to do with that cock, you girlyblouse”. she took off her top and pants and helped him take off his clothes. but then she wouldn’t touch him. she lied there and when he touched her belly she grabbed his hard cock and squeezed. he winced and she said, there’s a price for touching her. so he had to think about that. hard, because all his brain blood was in his penis. so he rubbed her belly again and she squeezed him again. huge price for any contact. he thinks, how will he ever get to make the sex with her if she keeps squeezing his penis. good point. next move: he rubs a breast, over her bra. kind of hard. and yes she squeezes again. all this is new for him and he’s wondering how much touching her he can do before she squeezes off his penis. next: breast under the bra and pressing her nipple. squeeze, still the same amount of pressure. thank god, i guess. next: he pulls down the top of her panties, fast, to reveal her bush. squeeze. he lets go. then he moves around in position to pull her panties right off. i remark that that sounds really bold. and he’s like, yeah. if he’s going to be hurt he wants as much as he can get for it. i say that sounds very transactional. so yeah, he pulls her panties off next. she sits up reach for his penis for the squeeze. he gets them off eventually and when he stops touching her she lets go. she lies back. he pushes her legs apart, far. squeeze. then he lies down between her legs with his face close to her cunt. and he watches her box. she seems to be pretty solidly not moving, just letting him watch her cunt as her body breathes and her lips get more flushed. and he knows she can’t reach his penis in this orientation. so he puts his finger about a centimeter in front of her labia. he moves it up and down without touching her. this is fun for him. and her. he brings his finger back and kisses her cunt. he gets about 2 seconds there, feeling the warmth of her cunt and she leaps up and jumps at his cock. squeeze. 2 seconds, harder now. she ends up lying on the bed in a loose 69 orientation, with his penis within her easy reach. and her cunt is close to his face and hands. he pushes her legs apart again. squeeze. he spends a bit more time looking at her close up labia and bush. breathing her in. then he dives in. fingers rubbing and pulling her labia [squeeze], finger into her vagina, in and out getting creamy [still squeezing his penis], then his tongue on her clit just pressing but no flicking [constant squeeze now] and he just wants to stay in this position until…..he dies of pain or something else. after a few seconds [or hours in non-linear sex time] her hips pull back, he pushes his finger further up her vagina, and she moans a bit [all while squeezing]. at the moan, he cums. despite her squeezing. and he describes this cum as “trying to get your whole body through a basketball hoop.” ok, right. not the clearest analogy, but i get the point. hard to push the cum out of a squeezed penis. “but once it got out it was magic.” and his penis softened a bit and was less pained by her grip. did she cum, i ask. “yes?” he suggests. typical. 🙂 juuuuust kidding. he’s a sensitive, giving man. and i ask what happened next. he said he was stunned because she didn’t wipe up his cum or dry up her creamy cunt. [not everyone worships kleenex] she just hopped up to the top of the bed, slid under the covers and called him up to get in there with her. and they watched tv. touching, hugging but no sex or other sexy acts. while he wonders if he should have tried to fuck with her, he is most “disturbed” by all that squeezing. that she wouldn’t “let” him have contact with her without there being a price. i said that it was a game. he wonders if i might be wrong and he’s right in presuming she wanted to hurt/oppress him and dangle her sex in front of him to be able to control him. i said the snuggly behaviour after he came shows she was in it for play. he mostly believes me. but i’m not going to try to fight to convince him that i’m right. so i’m crowd sourcing your wisdom.

so. my questions.

  1. what would you say to him about holding onto this self-torturing memory of peeing his pants in elementary school?
  2. and, vote on library girl: just playing or trying to degrade him?

i encourage/welcome your responses in the comments!

make my/his day! 🙂

i love you all!

in touch,

holly

Even Christians Need Gaydar

I had the mildly unpleasant duty of telling my friend Charlotte that the boy she has a crush on is gay. Bi, at the very least.

Not that there’s anything wrong with that… 🙂

Being bi myself, I can’t really judge Charlotte’s boy at all. But the unfortunate part of all this is that Charlotte assumes everyone at her church is straight…because they’re at her church.

Being Christian doesn’t mean you’re straight. Most Christians are straight because most people are mostly straight.

Christians at conservative not-so-gay friendly churches are not allowed to be gay. And if they are, as long as they don’t partake of any gay sex, they’re technically not sinning.

Christians at progressive, liberal churches can be as gay as they like.

But my dear Charlotte has liked this boy for some time now. She’s spoken of him often and last sunday I attended her church, mostly to see this dude. She insisted I wear a bra, btw.  🙂

So in about 10 seconds after meeting this guy, I knew he was gay. And he, of course, doesn’t know she has a crush on him. I can’t tell if he knows he’s gay or if he’s just ok with being who he is. He just seems to like Charlotte. And why not. She’s awesome.

But the assumption that males at conservative churches are worth being attracted to because they’re not gay for sure, is a bad one. It means girls don’t have to cultivate gaydar. This can be a debilitating disease.

Now, our agenda is to figure out why Charlotte is falling for a gay guy. Has she done this in the past? What has been her relationship like with her father? Is she looking for a safe guy to avoid real sex pressures or actual commitment?

These are the questions we are now talking about.

And maybe I’m reading too much into it. Maybe Charlotte just lacks gaydar. But either way, we’re going to get to the bottom of it!

In touch,

Holly

Why I’m Only a Bit of a Prostitute

Prostitution. I’m in favour. To not be is to be a hypocrite. But with limits.

Last weekend i spent a wonderful time in Kelowna. At the Delta. A big ass expensive hotel, with nice sheets. But sadly, not a view of the lake. For me anyway.

Technically, I was a prostitute. I was driven in the fellow’s car, had my meals and the room paid for [tho his business covered the room], enjoyed the gifts of lingerie and a summer dress, and got fucked a number of times in exchange.

I returned home with no $100 in my purse or anything tho. So technically… 🙂

But beyond technicalities, I hooked.

The guy was no stranger. He is the separated husband of a woman who taught at my school until last year. She was hard core in the micromanaging, cold fish, control freak way. She didn’t “get” students. And their need to not work 100% of their lives. They had been together for about 9 years. Married for  5. He got over her intensity and dumped her.

He works in branding/marketing. Two things I REALLY don’t like, but I like his body. And he’s really funny.

Over the weekend, I learned his soon-to-be ex was an intense fucker. Intense like at school. Liked to suck him till he came, then get him hard again and make him work her until she came. Sometimes more than once.

So I did a bit of that. He enjoyed parts of the weekend doing the exact same stuff he did with her, but with the difference being me and my body and my style. Same process, different content he called it. These marketing people, eh! 🙂

But my highlights were my times to explore what of him i’d always found attractive.

I wore no bra in the car and took off my panties on the highway. Did some rubbing in the car, of me, not him. My breasts and my clit.

And when we checked in i walked into the bathroom, into the shower, turned it on and wet me and my dress all up. And he fucked me all wet on the bed. That started the weekend well.

We got some room service and drank a bit, then he went out to the casino with some clients/marks.

Around 1130pm he phones me and asks if it’s ok to have some boys over to the room. I say sure. Committed to not fucking all 3 of them. And I didn’t, but I know that was a thing in his mind to see if it would end up there. Saucy man.

We all had drinks. They were generally polite, asking what I did, etc., but not so much about how me and “John” met. I guessed he told them, but I don’t think they know much about his marital past. New clients, or newish.

And then they left and I stripped and tied up John and gratified myself beside him on the bed while seeing if he’d cum. Nope. Good boy. Then I ordered pizza.

And while I opened the door only enough to bring in the pizza, John wasn’t so sure I wouldn’t fling the door wide open for delivery boy to see. Cue the porn music. I don’t know why he was worried. Maybe because that’s what I said I’d do with the door.

Bitch?

Bitch.

Whore, too.

Saturday, John’s is in conference/meeting/sales/branding/inspiration mode. I miss him all day. Sniff. I got shopping with his two . There are only 7,000 stores on Harvey. And one thing I love about the OK is that wearing a bikini around town, in the Subway, in the mall, is a uniform for some and not a problem for anyone [outwardly anyways].

And when I was in Sweet Dreams there were 3 girls [and by girls I mean 18-20] trying on things. One ended up quite high maintenance because each of the 3 of them and the staff sweetie all had different opinions about her “real” bra size. Clearly she had never had a proper fitting before. But after 19 million opinions she got some truth. 38C not 36D. That was fun to watch. But in the end she had to come to terms with not self-identifying as a D.

After the fitting and more hijinks and tryings-on, I mentioned to her in the corner how I’m a B. And while it’s not size that matters, it IS what you do with it. And I went into my stall and tightened up my bra one clasp and came back out and said that this difference makes a dull evening at the bar quite unpredictable. Then I went back in and loosened it to one clasp too loose and came back out and said, same for this. in a different way. It’s all about how you introduce your breasts to the world. And then I said I’d still fuck a penis regardless of which way it curves. FTW.

Anyway, I came away from there with this:

It’s a nice piece. Feels smooth. So picture this without the discrete bra and panty underneath it and that’s what i wore the rest of the weekend when we were in the room. Lots of access. And it got good and creamy.

Spent some time in the pool and sauna, got a bit frisky with myself in the sauna. That was nice. Then around 430pm John comes back to the room and I model my outfit for him. I ensure some time demonstrating the sheerness with which to see my nipples. And how I can untie the top to pull out a boob for him and rub a recently released cock head on it. And how I can lie back on the bed and push the skirt down to cover my cunt but not hide its terrain. And how I can sit on the back of the couch with one foot up there too showing how such a little skirt allows his cock to rub along my lips while I rub his balls. And how I can hold his phone and take a short video of his cock rubbing my sticky lips [not inside my cunt, mind you, because that would be fornication] and how for all day he hasn’t been able to fuck me that as i pull off the shoulder of my top and push his fingers onto my nipple, that he can cum on the outside my cunt and cream the skirt.

Then we dress for dinner, coMMANdo! With me in a navy sheer top over a cream cami and yoga skirt.

We came back to the room and slipped into the tub for a http://www.soapymassage.com. Me likey.

For breakfast, I sat on his face and he ate my cunt. Then I wouldn’t fuck him. Just kept saying no until it got so late we wouldn’t have enough time to get down to the restaurant to eat before his session. Cutting it close, I made him fuck me fast so we’d still be able to rush downstairs. But I took the poke up against the window with my yoga skirt up in the back, wondering how many people out there were drifting off to find a good local church. No one looked up and stared, though a few did glance up. They weren’t obvious though if their looks lingered.

After a quick tidy up we breakfasted and I swam and we checked out cruised a few girlclothes shops until I found a great summer dress with which to drive home in, coMMando! Of course.

He dropped me off and I felt nothing like a prostitute. I felt like a girl on more than a one night stand. It lasted 3 days, but it was much like a one night stand, which is usually not prostitution. Sure I got food, clothes, travel, rooms, uninterrupted naps, etc. but when i go out on dates, the fellow [only if he’s new] pays for dinner and a movie/play/cover and usually drives. And buys me liquor. And I either fuck him or i don’t.

Prostitutes have sex for money.

What’s the difference?

6 Reasons to Have Casual Sex? Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes

6 Reasons to Have Casual Sex | Sex & Relationships | AlterNet.

ok, so i’m down for all 6.

1. Asserting your desires can create a tremendous sense of power.

Yes.

2. It might help you transcend your inhibitions.

“This is the very target at which critics aim their arrows—how can women enjoy sex without an emotional connection?!—but this lack of investment can be freeing. It’s the same relative anonymity that causes some people to blurt out their deepest secrets to their hairdresser or a taxi driver.”

yes, or the girl in the coffee shop in montreal. then you start dating. then you drag her back to vancouver with you and put her pix at the top of your blog! 🙂

so true!

3. You’ll learn more about your sexuality

um, fuck yeah.

4. You might learn about yourself emotionally

“The fear and propaganda around one-night stands isn’t just sexist, it’s illogical. Bad long-term relationships involving miscommunication, unmet expectations, and lies are just as likely to damage participants as any sexual disappointment on a short-term scale.”

this is why i gleefully call myself a whore. to defuse the judgement that i get as a loose woman, when men are admired for the same behaviour.

5. You might be a better partner in a committed sexual relationship

“If you’ve experienced sex as a vehicle for relatively emotionally uncomplicated pleasure, you may even be less likely to go along with sex you don’t want, or to seize upon sex as a tool for manipulation.”

life’s short. try it once, if you don’t like it, move on. ok, maybe try it twice with a second partner. 🙂

“Another recent study, one conducted on 1,311 Minnesotans between the ages of 18 and 24, found that there was no correlation between emotional or mental distress and casual sex.”

liberation!

6. You’ll learn more about sex

liberation, some more.

jury’s in. get on it.

and to celebrate, the next cute chick i see in a coffee shop, sorry not starbucks tho, i’m going to flip my hair, bat my eye lashes and lean in close to see if she’d like to fuck me.

who will join me on this grand quest!?

WebCam Girls with a Heart of Gold

ok, so there’s lotsa places to find webcam girls and MyFreeCams.com is an interesting one.

dozens of girls. exhibitionism to the people! liberation!

and while many are in a nice bra/panty set, some are going gyno thumping. lotsa eastern european women. lotsa fun. 🙂

Blaire

WildLovexxx

but there are two worth mentioning. while many don’t talk at all, some talk a lot. Blaire and WildLovexxx.

i met Blaire several nights ago. she was talking about her life, her loves/passions/sexuality/etc. very refreshing to see someone’s soul/personality.

i ran into WildLovexxx this afternoon on my sick day, which wasn’t sick as much as a mental health day.

she too was chatty about her life and interests, etc.

and while WildLovexxx was ok being mostly topless, Blaire is a no-nude cam girl. very interesting because the site is all about sex. except there were 200-400 people in each of their cam/chatrooms when i saw them.

so presenting an actual personality seems to kick in well.

and frankly, these are two girls, i would enjoy going for a beer with. like younger cousins.

sure, they’re attractive and exhibitionists and sexy and all that, but they are also really interesting people. and i hate to say it, but there are precious few who would be a lot of fun going out for a beer with for more than about 45 minutes. both of these two girls hit that.

Sex Tips for Christian Girls #21: Hug More, Grope Less

Last week at church I re-met Bethany. She went by Beth in September when she first came to church. She was new to UBC and checking out churches. Turns out she spent most of the year at one of the churches on campus. Now she’s back here. Had some awkward relationship/friendship weirdness at that church. Some catty chicks. Been there, felt that.

So we caught up a bit after church last week and set a time to go out to see Alice in Wonderland tonight.

Ok, so it’s a crush and that’s ok. When we met at the theatre with like 20 minutes to spare, tix were sold out so we went for a beer. Which in reality was a pitcher of sangria. And we talked for a while and figured on trying again next week for the movie.

So we were heading back to the train to head home, rode the train and at my stop she got off too cuz we were in the middle of a discussion about Johnny Depp. A luscious conversation.

And after a few minutes I was about to go and I gave her a hug.

Hugging is good. Always. I hate shaking hands. Lame. 🙂

And the hug was the kind of hug after the kind of evening where I wanted to turn it into a groping hug and bum squeezing hug and pelvis bumping hug and an invitation to come back to my place so we could play around.

And after all these months and tonight and everything I was not sure she would go for that. And now that I’m all mature and wise and not young and stupid [always, anyway] I just hugged her with the love of a friend and I injected no sexual overtures into it.

I just held her. For the normal length of  a hug. And when I was loosening up at the end of the normal length, she wasn’t letting go, so i re-held on. Just hugging in a motionless holding.

And she just got warmer. Not emotionally [though she was], like physically. Keeping the hold on, waiting for me to do something other than just hold her. And the warmer was the rising tension of something not yet happening.

And if it all ended there, that would have been just fine. A warm, tender, loving friend hug. Felt good.

But she pulled out and smiled at me and kissed my cheek. Spectacular. I felt so loved and desired and hot and wanted and affirmed and and and and…

So I smiled big and putting one hand on her cheek I kissed her other cheek. And while my other hand could quite easily have done nothing, I nevertheless put it on her hip. But mostly back around her hip. Not quite on her ass, not quite on her thigh, but behind her hip enough so I could pull it about an inch closer to me.

And we said goodnight and I left. And heading up the escalator I looked back and she was standing there looking forward to where the train would take her closer to her home. And with her right hand she brushed her hair back from in front of her left shoulder to behind her shoulder, then she slid her hand from her shoulder down along her breast and crossed her arms.

And that, that, that is the thing I want to do to her the next time I see her.

Maybe we can agree to wear skirts to Alice when we actually go to see it. 🙂